There are two kinds of weddings that take place in times of pandemic – ones that happen and ones that don’t. But jokes aside, weddings do succeed or fail even during the happier virus-free times. The variable that is causing an increase in turmoil for matrimonies taking place in the past year or so is simply the pandemic itself, which brings with it a nasty series of predicaments.
Weddings are a complicated ordeal from the getgo as it is basically the unity of two families in the form of two individuals, the bride and groom. While in essence, only the bride and groom need to like each other and get along well for it to work, in reality, it is much more elaborate and intricate. Nowadays, everyone in the family gets involved and there is a great desire to learn about the other side so that they can get along and form an opinion (hopefully positive) of them. This over-involvement (self-coined term) creates a sense of over-exposure (another self-coined term) to the other side. While seemingly harmless, the extensive involvement thus makes weddings more problematic than it should, owing to the unfortunate fact the amount of people to consider and make happy for the ceremony to proceed swimmingly increases dramatically. Where it should just be about you, your bride and perhaps your folks, it now becomes about the aforementioned plus your aunts and uncles you saw 20 years ago and never get your name right.
Now imagine all that + the pandemic. One aftereffect of the pandemic is that it seems to have frozen everyone in place. Their plans, lives, jobs, everything is forcibly put to a halt courtesy of a global pause button from the universe. In spite of this, there are couples who try to make it work by attempting online weddings or closed-door weddings with only the most necessary parties involved in attendance. These endeavours are considered smart and bold as we see couples try to circumvent the pandemic’s effects on their future with optimism. Nonetheless, to certain groups of people, these types of weddings can be seen in a different, less flattering light.
The unity of a couple across many phases (engagement and matrimony for example) has recently evolved dramatically to become a rather public affair for the families involved. It has shed the more traditionally reserved nature and become rather extravagant. So, to have these changes forcibly rid with the way weddings are held in times of pandemic can see the external family members feeling a bit left out in a way. The act of getting married without so much as a “howdy, how do you do?” to the external family possibly makes them feel less important or irrelevant to the whole thing.
Be that as it may, some consideration is possibly warranted for young couples getting married today from everyone involved, as, well, the pandemic doesn’t necessarily make things easier. While it is understood that everyone wants to get involved and contribute to the merriment of the matrimony, the reality of the fact is that the layers upon layers of restrictions imposed by the authorities and constant precautions regarding the ongoing fight against the pandemic might permit against it. As much as your aunts and uncles want to be involved in your wedding, time simply cannot be paused for the weddings or fast-forwarded to the near or distant future where they can be directly involved in the ceremony. Rather than lament the inability to participate in the nitty-gritty, perhaps it is more beneficial to understand that it is less about you and more about the aspiring couple and wish them the best going forward.
Young couples trying to tie the knot in the present day will face more difficult challenges compared to the simpler times of 3 years ago ranging from personal, financial and relationship issues. Knowing that, the least family members can offer is to not add on to these unavoidable problems by taking issue with the way weddings have to be held in these trying times. Perhaps the best wedding gift you can provide for young couples embarking on the next stage in life together is to give them a little breathing space to navigate through these muddy waters and trust that they will find their way back to you when things are looking brighter.
As for the young couples braving the storm that comes with something as monumental as the married life, it is important to keep a level head and take things one step at a time. That is naturally easier said than done because it can be difficult to tackle one problem at a time when there are so many issues at hand. Nonetheless, you should know that there are a host of people willing to provide a lending hand, all you need to do is ask if things get too much. Your significant other will play a much bigger role in your life than you think, so do your best to support each other. This will form a strong pillar to a marriage that will be undeterred through thick and thin, which is the best kind of pillar.
Hartwick is a content writer under Headliner by Newswav, a programme where content creators get to tell their unique stories through articles and at the same time monetize their content within the Newswav app.
Register at headliner.newswav.com to become one of our content writers now!
*The views expressed are those of the author. If you have any questions about the content, copyright or other issues of the work, please contact Newswav.